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5 Tips to Change your Negative Thought Patterns

5 Tips to Change your Negative Thought Patterns

“Change your thoughts to change your life!”

 

Now you might be surprised at how often during the day you focus on a negative thought. The average person has 50,000 to 70,000 thoughts per day. So it’s no surprise that this can get out of hand pretty quickly.

The best thing you can do to stop negative thoughts, is try and become more aware of those times that you are thinking in a negative manner.

Your life is a reflection of everything you have programmed into your mind over the course of your life up until now. You have been programmed, every second of every day from the very minute that you are born. You’re being programmed with both your internal thoughts, and your external thoughts. Those internal thoughts are the ones that drive you. And in a nutshell, you are what you think you are.

thought reflection

Now your unconscious beliefs and thought patterns, literally shape the whole world around you, each and every second. Much like a broken record, your thoughts get stuck on what your problems are. And you can then lose the ability to break out of this negative cycle. This never ending cycle becomes your way of life. So you literally think yourself into creation. This then becomes the song that you sing, and the dance that you dance when you’re stuck in a cycle of despair. When we’re stuck in this cycle, all we can really do and all you’re actually really doing is expanding the presence and giving more power to that despair. You’re tightening its grip on you until it gets to a point where your mind is controlling you, when what we want to do is we want to totally flip it so that you are in control of your mind.

That brings me nicely on to my five quick tips to help you change your thoughts – You can watch the video here!

Tip 1 – Is to identify those automatic negative thoughts that keep coming up again and again. Because your thoughts are directly linked to your feelings and your behaviours as a result of those feelings. So, your thoughts influence how you feel, which influences how you behave, so listening and writing down your negative thought patterns can help increase your awareness. The very first step to anything we do is becoming more aware and writing things down so we’re getting them out of our minds and onto paper. It’s one of the simplest but most effective ways that we can bring these thoughts in to your awareness. So list down those thoughts that keep coming up for you, just simply write them down.

Tip 2 – Is explore the cause of that negative thought process or pattern. These could even relate to your childhood. This could be stuff that has been programmed from such a young age, potentially from your parents. Your parents have always wanted to protect you so there will be certain things that they would have said to you when you were younger, such as, don’t talk to strangers, we all get taught stranger danger when we are younger and that keeps us safe, and it’s really really important to know that as children. But as we enter our adult lives and we start to go out and about and we start to meet new people, we start a new job, we’re in business and go networking or we’re wanting to build a wider circle of friends, we have to start getting comfortable with talking to people we don’t know. And this completely goes against that belief that we have been taught not to speak to strangers. And there’s so many different things like that, so we need to catch these thoughts to become aware of them to explore where they come from.

Tip 3 – Is to keep a record of those negative thoughts and try and come up with words or phrases that counteract it. So if we go back to where we might say you can’t do something. In my house, I teach my children not to use the words, I can’t, because the evidence shows that every time they tell themselves they can’t do something, there will have been another time when they have said it and proved themselves wrong and this happens every time, so now we use ‘I’ll give it a go‘ because let’s face it, how do we know if we can do something or not, unless we give it a go. I don’t tend to use the words I’ll try because I find that a bit wishy washy. But if I say to myself or my children say to themselves, I’ll give it a go. It makes you feel good, it’s an empowering kind of statement, it totally changes your state, and how you feel about something than saying, I can’t.

believe in yourself

Tip 4 – is to use a tool such as NLP, or affirmations to help you think more positively. Now, through my series of videos, all of the videos that I create, are all to do with using my coaching and NLP techniques so if you subscribe to my You Tube channel to watch all my other videos, you’ll start to learn a lot more of these techniques to help you create more success in life but also to help you change the way you think and start believing in yourself more. List at least 10 negative thoughts that you’re having a day. This takes a little bit of time but as does everything. If you want anything to change. You have to practice. Repetition Repetition Repetition, the brain loves repetition. Now turn those thoughts on their head and creating a statement that better supports you .

Tip 5 –  is chunking or breaking large amounts of information down into smaller pieces. Now sometimes our negative thoughts can be big thoughts they can be those ones that are ingrained from years and years of that negative repetition. And in order to reframe them and change them into a more positive, we may have to chunk them down. It’s like with any goal or anything that we’re trying to achieve, if you try and deal with something that is too big, all in one go. You’re going to get to a point where you’re banging your head against a brick wall, you’ll feel like you’re failing and can’t do it It sends you into overwhelm, so rather than carrying on and dealing with it. You give up. So, pick that bigger thought apart into smaller ones and deal with those smaller ones. Once you’ve done that you can chunk it back up, so that you can see the bigger picture of what it was that’s going on.

Practice these tips often until it becomes so natural that you can do it automatically in minutes. Use a journal to help if needs be. I have my own personal journal that you can purchase here.

Faye Cox CoachingBELIEVING IN YOU UNTIL YOU DO TOO! If you’d like some support so you too can start believing in yourself, you can have a chat with me here

Faye Cox

If You’re Feeling Overly Stressed These 6 Tips Will Help You Through It

If You’re Feeling Overly Stressed These 6 Tips Will Help You Through It

We all experience it at one time or another; this trespasser called stress. It is perhaps the number one cause of most health problems in our society today. Here we explore 6 ways you can deal with the stress of life in a healthy and effective manner.

* Talk about the problems you are experiencing with friends, loved ones or a professional. Keeping everything bottled up will only create more problems later on. Talking is a great way to release the inner stresses of a situation and help you gain a better perspective on the situation that is the cause of your stress.

* Exercise often. Go for a walk for 20-30 minutes either every day or at least every other day. Exercise relieves tension and produces a calming effect. Perhaps joining a gym would work better for you. Remember it needs to be something that you will do regularly.

* Yoga is not only a great form of exercise in general for creating body strength. It’s also well known for quietening the mind and creating calm. Sit in a quiet room alone and begin breathing exercises.incorporate meditation in this and you have a powerful combination for relieving stress in the mind and body.

* Music is known to calm the stress beast. Listen to something that either relaxes you or gets you up and motivated. This is a great distraction technique that works wonders.

* Healthy meals can become an important factor in limiting your stress. Ensure you eat three meals a day, and make an effort to avoid too much caffeine and sugar. We’ve all heard the term ‘hangry’ and we’ve all felt it too. Skipping meals isn’t good for either your physical or mental health. Too much caffeine will send your head in to a spin, it over stimulates the brain and can cause what I term as the fast spin on the washing machine affect.

* Sleep deprivation is a big cause of stress. Go to bed earlier. Seven to eight hours sleep can make all the difference when possible. I used to stay up later as it was the only time I got to myself when the kids were younger, but it wasn’t doing me any good in the long run. In fact it was having the adverse effect.

Coping with stress can be challenging. Every day you seem to be pulled in every direction, trying to accommodate others, living in what feels like chaos. The first priority is to take care of YOU. YOU are the thread that holds your family together. If you’re stressed, you won’t be much good to anyone. You need to fill your cup first. You need your cup to be over-flowing so that your over-flowing cup then fills your partners and your kids cups. If you fill theirs first, then there is nothing left for you.

Give yourself a break every now and then. Buy a new outfit; go see a movie; do something you’ve always wanted to do. Your family can take care of themselves for one day. Alone time is just as important to you as it is for everyone else. Think of yourself as a gas tank; eventually you will run out of fuel.

Laughter is a wonderful release. You’ve probably noticed those times when you’ve laughed so hard, you cried. This is probably due to the fact you haven’t laughed in a while, and the tension released through laughter is the best cure-all method for dealing with stress-related issues.

Avoid stressful situations whenever possible. If you are a working mom, it’s probably not the job but the people who are causing you the most stress. Take everything in your stride and remember that it’s not about you, it’s about them.

If you can’t finish a task, don’t worry about it. If dinner doesn’t turn out as you expected, improvise or get a take-away. We stress over so many things that really don’t matter! No-one is judging you anywhere near as much as you’re judging yourself, so give yourself a break and stop being so hard on yourself.

Life is too short; and stress can reduce it even further. Nothing is more important than your health or state of mind. Eleanor Roosevelt wisely said, “No one can make you a victim without your consent.” She was right; it is, after all, up to you.

If you’d like help managing your stress then feel free to book a FREE 30 minute call with me where we can discuss how I can help you further.